Crazy?

I have finished 3 out of the 4 weeks of my first clinical rotation which happens to be Psychiatry.  Going into this rotation I did not know what to expect and actually felt like it would be a waste of time.  After all, what did I care about these "crazy" people!  Through these 3 weeks I have seen people who suffer from depression, bipolar disorder, personality disorders, schizophrenia in all its forms, and every type of substance abuse you can think of.  I have seen people who want to kill themselves or maybe have tried multiple times, people who are homeless and are tired of sleeping on the ground, people whose children have been taken from them, people who hear voices telling them to hurt others, people who are so strung out on drugs that nothing short of a miracle will save them, people who have been physically and sexually abused by their own fathers and uncles, people who hate the way they look so much that they hate themselves and everyone else, and others that do not come to mind right now.  

Up until 3 weeks ago, I thought that people who were a little different or had trouble functioning in society or had mood swings just needed to SUCK IT UP and take control of their life.  I stereotyped them and grouped them all together and assumed that they needed Jesus and if they had problems like this they surely did not have Him in their life.  Of course they need Jesus just as all of us need Jesus but one thing I have learned is that some of these people are Christians and love God but still have struggles that I and a lot of people blow off because they are "crazy."  

In the past three weeks I have learned about diseases, medicines, and the complexity of the human mind.  That is what I am supposed to do as I progress through my clinical rotations.  I believe that the most important thing I have learned is to have compassion and empathy towards those with mental illnesses, substance abuse issues, and those with no place to go home.  Most days, I leave with a sinking feeling in my gut and I feel so sorry for the patients I have seen that day.  Part of this feeling is from reflecting on the suffering of these people but part of it is reflecting on the fact that 3 weeks ago, I would not have even given these people a chance before labeling them "crazy."  Not only do they have to suffer from their illness but they also must suffer from being considered outcasts or unclean by society and unfortunately even by us Christians.  I know in my heart that if Jesus in the flesh had met my patients that he would have tremendous compassion for them.  Thankfully, He does know all of them and He does love all of them just as much as he loves me.  How will some of these people know that?  I think by seeing and experiencing God's love and compassion through people like you and me.

Everyday I realize that I am so blessed and have been given so much in my life.  My life is a cake walk compared to many others.  I could not have asked for a better life.  These past 3 weeks continue to remind me of that and remind me that I should thank God for all He has done and entrusted to me.  If my life should ever change and I have to deal with the problems that some of my patients suffer with, I hope that others could have compassion for me as I have now have for the wonderful, God-loved people I have met over the past 3 weeks.  There is a lot of evil, illness, and suffering in this world but thankfully, my God is bigger and greater than all!